Monday, 28 May 2018

Trimester Three: The Last Hurdle

Trimester Two passed by nearly as quickly as trimester one and I was busy at work and getting to grips with my growing bump. In set trimester three. Trimester three was the last trimester before we met baby - one I spent growing even more, feeling stronger kicks and nudges and pokes and prods.

In the third trimester, the thing I heard the most was how big I was getting - I was well aware of my bump but for some reason, people felt it necessary to mention this to me. This included random people, STRANGERS, asking me how far along I was. After hearing my answer they'd respond with "are you sure it's not twins?! You're HUGE". I was almost certain that I was not having twins but still kept having to remind others that I wasn't.

Another reminder that I was getting bigger was the fact that most of my clothes didn't fit me. Things stopped fitting me in the space of weeks and I found myself wearing the same few tops over and over as I was reluctant to buy new ones. I decided not to buy too many new clothes - I wouldn’t be wearing them for that long anyway and so I kept on going with the few things that I did have. It worked for me. It wasn't too bad, not as bad as I make it sound anyway. 

I waddled already but my cankles teamed with my growing bump made my waddling walk more prominent, much more noticeable. One may have compared it to that of a penguin.

This aside, I didn’t mind it so much. The third trimester was one where I felt bigger, stronger movements, I watched my baby grow through my bump growth and listened to the heart beat at every appointment. The arrival of Baby B was drawing closer and I kept thinking of what it would be like once baby did arrive. It was actually quite exciting!! 
My lovely friends even threw me a surprise baby shower and I felt very loved!  

I looked more at baby clothes and things for the baby but we decided to buy as we needed when the time came, and therefore bought only the essentials. We’d buy other stuff when the time came and we knew if baby was a boy or a girl. I found that the gender neutral clothes weren't that exciting so that didn't really help.

There were times I wanted to speed things up but I knew that baby would come when baby was ready, and so I carried on going. The worries I had initially were slowly pushed back, still there but now they were mixed with feeings of excitement and job, and tiredness! 

A few weeks into my third trimester, I met a lovely lady who gave me an eye opening reminder. It’s one I’d like to share with you all. I mentioned to her that I thought I was unprepared, scared of the immense responsibility this baby would bring and she said it’s completely normal to feel that way. That’s why we have nine months to get used to the idea. Nine months. Nine. It could have been weeks or a few months but it wasn’t, it was nine months. And that’s the perfect amount of time to process the information and prepare for baby. This made so much sense and really did make me feel better. 

And just like trimester one and two, trimester three flew by!! And soon enough we would be able to meet our baby! That made everything worth it.

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Thursday, 29 March 2018

Trimester Two: The Bump

Trimester one quickly merged in with trimester two as once I had gotten my head round everything, time had passed. We were also super busy with things at home and work.

So in came trimester two of three. In this trimester bump grew - pretty fast and baby continued to develop. At the beginning of our second twelve weeks we had our first scan and slowly, very slowly, we began to tell people. We started off with close (as in immediate) family and very close friends and stopped there. Well I stopped there but I think Mr B  told a few more people - such as his whole office! There are still people to this day that don't know I'm expecting! You see, I didn't hide it, but I didn't actually tell people either. I figured it'd be obvious when my bump grew big enough anyway. And it did grow quite fast during this short time. It became more and more obvious that I hadn't over-eaten and wasn't suffering from a severe case of wind, I was indeed pregnant. 

This trimester went slightly better than the first (the first was a blur)- although it was just as fast. My sickness began to ease off and I started to accept the idea of being pregnant a bit more. We began talking about the baby a little more and slowly slowly, the baby began to become a part of our lives. 
I felt little flutters - and at first I was uncertain about what it was - was it butterflies of the baby?! How do I know?! Eventually I realised that it was indeed the baby as the movements got stronger and the baby grew. 

The whole idea started to become more and more real. It really kicked in when we went to a family get together where I saw family members I hadn't seen in a while - and the fact that I was pregnant became known to pretty much everyone in the room on that day - there were a lot of people. At least I didn't have to announce! It went round the room like Chinese whispers and that was that, the word was officially out. 

Another big hint that I was pregnant, according to one of my best friends who also happened to be working in the same office as me at that time, were my eating habits. I've always liked food and eating but apparently my snacking little and very often was big indicator of the fact that I was pregnant. I should have known really but I couldn't help but eating little and often - I was hungry and my stomach was squished! It was, however what the midwife had recommended and therefore I didn't even try to stop. Luckily for me I began to tell people not long after this anyway! 

This trimester was one of acceptance, learning to deal with being pregnant but also watching my bump as it grew and feeling movements become stronger. I began to change my work outs in the gym to make sure bump was ok and that my body could handle the changes, and also grew out of clothes very fast. I could buy a new, bigger top and it would no longer button up two weeks later! Baby was growing fast!
My growing bump
One more important thing I'd like to share with you all is some advice I got towards the end of my second trimester. This advice came from a complete stranger at the gym after I'd been for a swim one morning. She told me that everyone would be full of advice, of stories and telling me how it happened for them, or didn't happen for them. But the truth is, everyone is different. You have to do things in your own way. Maybe the end result will be the same but the process of getting there isn't. Our bodies are all unique and therefore so our are experiences. And this, she told me, was nothing to be afraid of. Don't worry if it doesn't work the way people say it should.

I wish someone had told me that earlier in my life - about life - as this would have helped a lot for any different things!

How do you feel about it? Have you had a baby, is pregnant or know someone who has/is?

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Sunday, 25 February 2018

Trimester One - Finding Out

We were so busy when I fell pregnant that I didn’t actually notice at first. We had a family wedding, a funeral, Eid - as well as other things and I’d just started working for a different department at work. In fact, when I did realise I was in denial – I was so sure that I was just feeling under the weather that my other half went out and bought a pregnancy test. Yes he did. I guess he was convinced that my ‘bug’ should have disappeared – and right he was.
I still wasn’t so sure, even after taking a test. A test didn't prove anything to me. I insisted that he took a test just to prove that the test was right. I figured that if it read positive for him then there was definitely a mistake and I really was just recovering from a bug. He wouldn’t do it, no matter how much I insisted, and I really did insist.

So yep, that was that. The test came out positive and I didn't take another one because I thought I'd wait to see how I felt first - not much changed. I kept feeling nauseous all day long for what felt like eons, and was occasionally sick. I then fell into a routine of being sick and then feeling like I was going to be sick every other minute of the day. It was not pleasant at all having a lingering sick feeling.

I sat on the news for a while, told no one and said nothing and my other half patiently waited whilst I got my head round it. I think it was more real for him right from the minute the result came out positive - where as I take time to process things and think them through. And boy did I think - good thoughts and then worries about the immense responsibility a child is. I needed to get my pregnancy confirmed so I booked an appointment and tada - we were told we were expecting a baby child! Baby B was officially official. (Baby 'B' because of our surname.)

It was slightly surreal because when I had my first appointment with the midwife I didn't have to do any tests - no blood test or anything so when I came home I was still in that 'I'm not so sure' stage - going to the doctors didn't make me believe it any more! But then soon after I did have blood tests, and after that a scan and very quickly things in my mind adjusted themselves. We became more used to the idea - there really was a tiny human growing inside me that would need to come out at some point.

This thought scared me silly. Not that it'd have to come out, that was far away and I wasn't thinking too much about it, but that it would depend on us. That tiny human would be our responsibility, to clothe, feed, help to provide opportunities and do the best we can and that was it - there was no turning back. No refunds or exchanges. Although I'm sure we'd never want to do that but still, the idea is perfectly feasible. It wasn't only about us anymore - we had another human to consider. A whole other human.

It's ok to be happy and scared all at the same time right?!  But as scary as it may seem, we were over the moon! A baby!!!!

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Monday, 29 January 2018

Rome 2017 - The Sights

In Rome, as mentioned here, there is a lot to explore. Here are but a few places we visited:

Trevi Fountains
That view :)
If you're going to Rome you must, absolutely must, visit this hidden gem - you'd be crazy not to. we found the fountains at the end of a long day - the way we had planned to. We spent the day walking and exploring Rome and the fountains were our last stop for the day. That was day two of or stay in Rome and from that day on, we somehow ended up by the steps of the fountains every night after.

I'm not sure why but I expected the fountains to be in a park, or a garden or some huge courtyard (somewhere spacious),  much like fountains in the UK but  this was quite the opposite. The Trevi Fountains are situated in a small side street, surrounded by hotels, shops, a basilica and people, lots of people. We took a turn from the main street into a side street and bam - there they were, hidden within the business of Rome. It's so obvious that the area grew around the fountains and that's what added to the splendour of them. Definitely go and see them!!

Spanish Steps
This, as the name implies, is a set of steps leading up to a Church. If you go down the steps, you'll come to a small yet beautiful fountain and lots of shops, a few street sellers and a few horse drawn carriages. The steps were really lovely to look at and walk down and the view from the top was quite something. As is the view from the bottom when you see the full extent of the Spanish Steps.

The Spanish Steps
Vatican City
Look Up!!
Right, so on the last Sunday of every month Vatican City opens for a few hours and entry is free - that's right, free. We were, conveniently there, in Rome, on the last Sunday of the month and we had planned to go then, but we asked around and were told that if we wanted to go, we'd have to be there for 8am in order to get in around 12pm when they opened....that was so not happening. Also, the Pope was going to visit so as a bonus, we could have seen the Pope. But apparently it gets so so so busy that we decided to pay the entry fee and take a look another day.  We took a bus to Vatican City - one of the few times we actually took public transport. We walked everywhere else!  As soon as we got there we were mildly accosted by tour guides, claiming that but going with them we could skip the hour long line to get in and see things much faster. But we decided to stand in line - experience it all! It was about an hours wait, maybe less but the line of people behind us didn't reduce at any time - there were times where it got longer but never shorter than where we started!
Was it worth the wait - yes.
St Peters Square is beautiful, the amount of time and work that must have gone into making it - one thing I'd tell you to do is to look up when you are there. Look up at the buildings and how they're made, the detail and their finishing, the angels on the ends, standing and watching.

Inside, it's beautiful - as one would expect. The walls are decorated from top to bottom and there is so much to see - so much to soak up. This goes for everything there - the paintings, the sculptures, all the artwork is phenomenal and worth seeing, from the works of Michelangelo to Raphael.

The Sistine Chapel was in the Vatican City Museum at the end and there I found the atmosphere to be serene, peaceful and we spent a lot of time looking at the walls and ceiling. They also must pay someone to 'shhhhh' very loudly because that persons ever so slightly annoying.
If you're in Rome - go.

Coliseum and the Roman Forum
Inside the Coliseum
One of last things we did was to visit the Coliseum. We could see glimpses of the Coliseum from our hotel and the side streets - it's a view I'll never forget. The Coliseum lit up at night is beautiful - and I think it's beautiful in the day time too. My personal opinion - I didn't find it as jaw dropping as I had expected - I had gone in with images from the Gladiator film expecting it to be huge on the inside  and it wasn't as big as I had thought - in reality it's much smaller. It was worth a look because not seeing it would have been silly, but I wasn't that impressed. I think maybe next time I'd take a tour which takes us underneath the Coliseum - where the Gladiators and animals actually lived.
We had walked past the Forum every day since our arrival and so we knew what to expect before we visited it properly - ruins, a lot of ruins and Palatine Hill which overlooked the Coliseum and the Forum.

These are but a few places we visited in Rome - I haven't even mentioned the Pantheon, the numerous Basilicas and monuments we came across. There was just so much to see. And the food. Oh the food - delicious!

Have you been to Rome? Is it somewhere you'd like to go?

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Sunday, 31 December 2017

2017: A Reflection

My mandatory foot photo 
This year has gone both fast and slow. There have been times where I've waited for the weeks to pass and others have gone too fast - so a mixture I'd say - good nonetheless. There haven't been many blog posts this year - you'll have noticed that I've been on and off with the posts, less consistent, sporadic and slightly annoying, both for myself and for you as my readers. But I have tried to post wherever I can - honest! I'm hoping that I'll get better with consistency and timing - in both life and blogging :).

2017 has been a big year in the life of F, maybe not so much for That Delete Button but definitely for me personally. Some of these events, milestones, whatever you may want to call them have been blog worthy but because I haven't had much time, I've not always been able to blog about them. So, I'm going to do a mini reflection of the past year instead so you can know what the heck I'm rambling on about!

If I had blogged about a few of these reasons, I think my blog would have been doing a little better. Maybe I'll blog about these things soon!

Things I've done in 2017:
  • Tied the knot: So I got engaged and religiously married in 2016 but had a bigger, more formal-ish wedding in 2017. That's right, we had a few too many parties - too many dates to remember - but I wouldn't change it. That was the highlight of my year - our wedding. It went fast but I loved how family and friends all came together and had fun! I'm contemplating making a blog post with photos of it...thoughts?
  • Malaysia: We travelled to Malaysia and it was soooo good, Langkawi and Kuala Lumpur - I have blogged about this so go read it if you want to know more!
  • Rome: another place we explored was Rome. More posts about Rome to come!  
  • Teaching: After doing the CELTA I didn't get a job abroad - the timing wasn't right - but I did manage to do some teaching here in the UK. I taught in two different places and both were different. It's weird how different educational establishments can be so varied in their approach - also the backgrounds of the students matter too! The first time round the students were very talkative and the second time, they were focused but made things fun for themselves! People are quite amazing!
  • Oh and one final thing - my blog turned five this month! Yes, that's right, That Delete Button is five years old!! FIVE!!!
I promise I'll try to blog about some of the things mentioned above soon - let me know if there's anything in particular you'd like to know more about!!

What have you done over the last year?  What are you particularly proud of?

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Thursday, 14 December 2017

Rome 2017

The Colosseum

Mr F has always wanted to go to Rome – I want to go everywhere and as long as we go somewhere I’m perfectly happy!

Anyway, we went very recently. It was awesome – we were lucky the weather was mild – not too hot and not too cold. Mornings were slightly cold but warmed up nicely as the afternoon came and then it cooled back down a little in the evening – not coat cold, jacket cold. There were a few people with coats on but we wore our jackets – which were quite hastily discarded as the day went on. Put it this way, we enjoyed the gelato!

Rome is rich in history and architecture, full of marvellous things to look at. Lots of ruins,  the Spanish Steps, Pantheon, Colosseum, Palatine Hill and the Roman Forum. There's Vatican City with St Peters Basilica and the Sistine Chapel as well as many many other basilicas. Basilicas on every corner and often more than one in a street! So much to see! 

One assumes that given the amount of basilicas there were in Rome, and the Pope, it would be quite a religious environment - yet religion wasn't imposed on anyone. There was no time during the trip where I felt uncomfortable - even among a congregation of Priests hosting a concert! They were really welcoming. Of course each Basilica had a few rules such as being covered up and not taking photos - but these sorts of things have been requested in many buildings I have been to before. It's not something new or unexpected.

I'll do another post with more information about the places we visited but on the whole, if you haven't already, add Rome to your travel list. And whilst your at it, make sure you spend a few days extra there - so if you are thinking of going for 4 days, add an extra one/two days - I don't think there can every be enough days in Rome!

So I leave you now with five tips for exploring Rome - in the mean time I'll be sorting my Rome photos out before writing a bit more about the places we visited!

5 Tips for Exploring Rome:
  1. comfortable shoes - the streets are cobbled
  2. be open to exploring - there are things to see everywhere!
  3. get your walking feet on - if you're going to do a lot of things by foot, your feet will ache after - mine did!
  4. be prepared to fall in love with the Trevi Fountains! 
  5. Eat! Eat their delicious food and Gelato! Super yummy!!
Where have you been recently? Have you been to Rome? 

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